It may well be the case that you need help finding a girlfriend. Before I broke down my own barriers, I went through a drought myself.
There are 7 essential steps that my 15 years of experience as a dating expert have shown me you should follow to secure a long-term, successful relationship.
1) be the best you
If you’re not spending substantial amounts of time and energy investing in yourself, why should a woman dedicate her own valuable time to you? You have to make sure you are laying a solid foundation for a relationship by having a solid handle on every part of your life.
Women are attracted to confidence, and confidence only comes from actively partaking in the process of improving yourself.
Even if you’re still en route to your goals, take care of your physical, professional, emotional, and financial needs before getting out there. It will make you a far stronger case for a woman’s investment.
2) be well-groomed
Attractiveness lies not in natural physical beauty but how you choose to present yourself.
Personal grooming shows how much care you take of yourself. Packaging is important. Nurture your personal brand to the point that it is expressed the moment you walk into a room.
Make sure you keep your breath fresh, your hair smart and modern, your clothes sharp, and your personal hygiene on-point.
Read more here: How to Get a Girlfriend
3) ask open questions
This is important for two reasons. The first is that open questions stimulate a rich and varied conversation and give the woman you’re talking to the ability to discuss any person’s favourite subject – themselves.
The other reason is that it allows you to qualify women against your expectations. You should always know what type of woman you want to date, and open questions are a way to compare any woman you speak to with how they size up against what you expect from a long-term partner.
Men often feel that talking to women us about proving they’re “good enough” but it should be the other way round.
4) control your body language
Most human communication occurs without words, and it can only take a few misjudged lapses in physical presence or nervous tics to belie a lack of confidence.
Engaging in activities such as yoga or meditation can help centre a person physically and relocate nervous energy. This aspect involves focused thought and behavioral change.
5) have fun and self-amuse
The best way to make sure other people are having fun is by having it yourself.
Go out, do things you find funny, set yourself amusing challenges, and draw other people, male and female, into these games.
High-fiving everyone in the room, for example, is simple but highly effective.
6) stay scarce after you meet her
When you do get that phone number, don’t immediately text her. The 3-day window, however, is also a myth.
Make yourself look scarce, busy, and popular. If you immediately bombard her, it becomes clear you’re not doing all that much else.
When you do touch base, make sure you refer to a running joke or shared experience to trigger those positive feelings.
7) communicate openly
When you’re laying out the boundaries for a potential relationship, and especially when you’re involved in one, communicating is vital.
Let her know what you expect. Listen to what she wants from the relationship. And speak openly without fear of losing her.
She will respect that honesty and find it refreshing. And if she does swerve the relationship due to not aligning with your view, it would never have worked anyway, so it’s no loss.
Relationships are hard and finding them can seem tough – but both can be fun and fulfilling so long as you are assertive and taking control of the direction of the relationship.