I recently went out to dinner with a few of my friends and their significant others. I was hoping to have a fun and relaxing meal with the people I cared about.
Instead, what happened?
Bickering. Fighting. Complaining about trying to make the other person happy and then piling on each other.
I had thought my friend’s relationships were all in good shape, but after that dinner I realized that there were some major cracks in the foundations.
I realized that even the strongest relationships can fall prey to a few basic mistakes, and once they do it becomes very hard to repair the damage, no matter how strong the relationship is. Even if it’s a marriage.
I sat down, concentrated, and came up with a list of 8 habits that will undermine and destroy even the strongest relationship. If you recognize one of these habits from your own relationship or you think it’s starting to develop, make sure to nip it in the bud immediately.
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1. Insisting On Being Right
Everyone’s got an ego – we’re all human. And as humans with egos, sometimes we care more about being right than we care about another person’s feelings.
That’s why in a relationship it’s especially important to monitor that instinct towards selfishness, and stop pushing to come out on top in every disagreement if you see that it’s hurting your partner’s feelings.
It’s important to remember how much you love your partner, even in the most heated of arguments, and realize that your love for each other is more important than being right in one argument.
All healthy couples will do these 10 things.
2. Stopping Complimenting Each Other
All relationships grow more and more comfortable as they go on, until it feels like your partner is practically an extension of yourself.
However, that’s not an excuse to stop giving them compliments!
Compliments are important – they go a long way in any relationship. When’s the last time you got tired of hearing someone say “I love you” ?
It’s easy to get so comfortable with someone that you stop giving them compliments and flirting with them, because “they know how I feel already.” People never stop wanting to hear “I love you”.
Don’t allow a day to pass without complimenting your partner, telling them how beautiful you think they are, and how much you love them.
3. Concealing Your Problems
Relationships are such intimate things. They represent the most intimate connection between two people that there is.
That’s why it’s important not to stifle the intimacy of your relationship by concealing your flaws and problems from your partner.
If you don’t allow your partner to know you completely, inside and out, the good and the bad, then how can you expect them to love your true self? They won’t know who you truly are?
Honesty begets honesty. When you’re completely honest with your partner, they’ll be completely honest with you, and you’ll make each other stronger in the process.
It’s not important to try to impress your partner with a lie, instead, impress them with your ability to tell them the truth and be completely transparent with them – your relationship will be stronger for it.
Here are 6 ways to spot an unhealthy relationship.
4. Not Being “Present” With Each Other
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OK, so you made the effort and took the time to clear your schedule, and now you have some extra time to be with your partner. Is that all it takes?
No. It’s not enough to just “be there” with your partner, you actually have to be present with them! Just sitting there like a lump while your mind is a million miles away doesn’t count as really spending time with them.
When you spend time with your partner, you should care what they’re saying – the questions they’re asking you, the mood that they’re in, the interests they’re talking about – you should be paying attention to all of it.
If you’re just spacing out while your partner is talking, why are you even taking the time to be with them? You’re not being “present” with them, and it’s not making them or you happy.
All relationships require attention, love, and effort to flourish, and your partner needs to know that you’re mentally present and actively engaging when you’re with them.
These 5 common and deadly mistakes will destroy relationships.
5. Refusing To Compromise
All relationships require work. Even if two people are absolutely perfect for each other and compatible in every way, the relationship still requires effort and upkeep to survive.
This is especially true in a relationship where you and your partner disagree over certain things. If you want to keep your relationship strong, you have to learn the art of the compromise.
It’s easy to spend so long with someone that you begin to take them for granted and think that you don’t have to compromise with them anymore… but this is a mistake that destroys even the strongest relationships.
Instead, prove your love for them with your actions, and with your desire to compromise for them so that they can be happy. If you’re selfless with your partner, your partner will be selfless with you, and you will both treat each other’s happiness as your own.
End any fight with these 5 simple steps.
6. Competing With Each Other
Relationships aren’t competitions between two people – they’re partnerships. You and your partner are in things together, not against each other.
You and your partner join together to form a unit… a unit that’s much more powerful together than it ever was on its own.
Instead of pointing out your partner’s flaws or attacking their weaknesses, you should be helping them, supporting them when they’re less strong, and letting them help you when they’re stronger than you are.
That’s how to