When you fall in love, your dream is for that love to last forever. There’s nothing worse than falling head over heels for someone, only to end up heartbroken and confused about what went wrong, endlessly wondering where you went wrong and how to go back to how things used to be.
So what are the secrets of couples that stay together? How do their relationships stay so strong for so long?
Here are the top 20 secrets behind long lasting couples whose relationships last forever:
1. Remember to kiss hello and goodbye every time
How sweet is it when he has to go to work extra early – but still stops by the bed to kiss you goodbye trying not to wake you up because he can’t help wanting to do it?
That little bit of extra intimate contact as you say good bye at the beginning of the day and hello at the end goes a long way, and keeps the flame of intimacy burning strong in your relationship.
2. Say “I love you” without restraint
When it comes to the 3 little words, more is always better than less. This is one phrase you can’t say too much to each other.
Take The Quiz: Are You Meant To Be Together?
3. Let fights happen without turning them into world-enders
Sometimes the wrong set of circumstances hit and you and your s/o are going to fight with each other. Just because you’re mad at each other doesn’t mean you don’t love each other, and every fight doesn’t mean that the relationship is ending. Couples that go the distance can rise above petty fights and recognize what’s most important.
4. When he texts or calls you, respond to him (and hold him to the same standard)
No one likes to wait around for their significant other to text or call back. Prompt replies should be the standard, not the exception, and your priority should be keeping in touch with your partner.
5. Don’t make fun of each other
Even if you’re “just joking”, imagine how he’d feel if he heard you. The most important word to keep in mind here is respect – and keeping the respect in your relationship is crucial to it surviving.
6. Understand that every relationship comes with responsibilities
You’re not going to want to do the same thing as your partner all the time. Sometimes, that means doing things you really don’t want to do – like chores, or errands, or going to his stupid work party – just because you know it makes him happy.
7. Don’t be late
How many times have you gotten into a spat or a stupid fight that started because one person was annoyed the other person was late?
If you’re chronically late or unprepared, start getting ready a half hour before you normally would so you don’t upset your partner (or someone else that cares about punctuality). Plus, putting in the effort to be on time means your partner will perk up and put in the effort too.
8. Hold your partner to his side of the bargain – but prioritize what’s important to you
You should absolutely let your partner know which events you really want him to be at and which ones you don’t mind him skipping, and let him be honest with you. Because let’s be honest with each other – spending Christmas with your family is a little more important than attending his friend’s Kentucky Derby party, right?
9. Don’t forget how important it is to ask your partner how their day went
Just because you’ve been together for a long time and you know how his day went without even asking him, it’s still important to ask him. If he feels like you don’t even care what happened to him that day, he’ll feel alone and isolated in the relationship, and that undermines the foundation of even the strongest relationship.
10. Don’t fight on vacations
I know it’s a stressful time, and there’s nothing worse than sitting at the airport after a flight has been cancelled or getting to a hotel and finding out it’s a dump.
Oh wait, there is something worse – doing all that and fighting with your partner about it. Make sure to keep calm and avoid fights while you travel to avoid putting a ton of stress into an already stressful situation.
11. Treat each other’s families like, well, family
Becoming bigger and bigger parts of each other’s lives is all about sharing more and more – and what better thing to share than family? If his family knows you think of them as your family too – and vice versa – it strengthen the bonds of your relationship even more.
12. Surprise random gifts mean a lot
Sometimes, this comes down to knowing your partner’s tastes – and exactly what’s going to put a smile on his face at the end of the day. If you know he loves double stuf mint oreos and you bring him home a bag, he knows that he was on your mind all day – and it makes him feel loved.
13. Clear time in the schedule to just spend time with each other
Sometimes, this means saying no to plans you would have otherwise attended – because you and the hubby haven’t had some time to yourselves in too long and you need a night of downtime.
Spending your free time just being together can do wonders for the health of a relationship.
14. Defend your partner if someone is talking smack about them
It doesn’t matter if you’re the type of person who normally shies away from confrontation and doesn’t like correcting people – you’ve got your partner’s back and they have yours. Don’t let someone else disrespect your partner without standing up for them.
15. Double dates aren’t always the best
There’s nothing better than finding another couple where things just click – you and your partner each like both halves of the other couple, and they feel the same about you. But if things aren’t clicking, and your partner doesn’t like your best friend’s bf, it’s ok to skip the double date rather than force things.
16. Help each other out when you get sick
Sometimes you’re going to get sick, and sometimes your partner is going to come down with something.
When that happens, be ready to head to the grocery store to get them comfort food, or the pharmacy to get them nose drops, even it means cancelling plans for the night. They need you – now’s your time to shine.
17. Help each other out when you get stressed
Maybe his work is imposing some crazy deadline and he’s feeling crunched. Maybe you’ve got 12 projects you’re juggling at once and you don’t know how you’re going to get them all done. If you know that your partner is feeling crunched for time and stressed (or vice versa), it’s time for the less stressed partner to pick up some slack around the house for chores and errands to help each other out.
18. Allow some room for spontaneity in your relationship
Want to make a random ordinary night special? Try booking a last minute dinner reservation for two. Making room for fun and being spontaneous in your relationship is crucial to keeping things fresh and healthy. Another great spontaneity tip – surprise quickies, any time of day.
19. Keep each other updated about what’s going on
You’re going to your friend’s house to watch your favorite show after work? That’s awesome, you should enjoy, but also remember to let your partner know so he doesn’t wonder where you are and he can make his own plans if he wants. You would want him to extend you the same courtesy.
20. Love each other without reservation
Ok, this one is super simple. Doesn’t make it any less true.
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Take The Quiz: Are You Meant To Be Together?
The Biggest Secrets To A Relationship That Lasts Forever
- Remember to kiss hello and goodbye every time
- Say “I love you” without restraint
- Let fights happen without turning them into world-enders
- When he texts or calls you, respond to him (and hold him to the same standard)
- Don’t make fun of each other
- Understand that every relationship comes with responsibilities
- Don’t be late
- Hold your partner to his side of the bargain – but prioritize what’s important to you
- Don’t forget how important it is to ask your partner how their day went
- Don’t fight on vacations
- Treat each other’s families like, well, family
- Surprise random gifts mean a lot
- Clear time in the schedule to just spend time with each other
- Defend your partner if someone is talking smack about them
- Double dates aren’t always the best
- Help each other out when you get sick
- Help each other out when you get stressed
- Allow some room for spontaneity in your relationship
- Keep each other updated about what’s going on
- Love each other without reservation