The pain in your chest is eating you alive. You can’t survive anymore without him. He abandoned you. He threw you away, after everything you had together. After all that time you spent being cuddly, hopeless romantics with stars in your eyes… he just walked away as if it was nothing.
He was cold. It was as if breaking up didn’t put a gash in his heart the way it put a gash in yours.
You wonder to yourself: how could he throw me away so ruthlessly? How could he just break up with me and walk away?
Or maybe he didn’t abandon you ruthlessly. Maybe the breakup was tough for him too, and you know it. But still, he was fine with walking away. He was fine with breaking up and ultimately making the decision to leave. How could this be?
These are feelings so many women experience after a breakup. Well, today I want to talk to you about my friend Becky. She taught me a valuable lesson about getting dumped (and why it can be a good thing).
When Becky called me I could just tell she was in rough shape. I could hear the distress in her shaky voice as she asked me, “Can you come over? I really need your help right now.”
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I was scared, honestly. I thought she was really hurt, and from the raw emotion in her voice I could tell she was really roughed up. Something terrible happened and I had to be there for her.
I grabbed my car keys, my cellphone just in case she called me again, and I left. Soon I was at her front door.
I rang the doorbell a few times, and after several minutes I got no answer. I even thought about breaking down her door because I thought she might have been hurt and unable to answer the door! I clenched my fist and as I knocked again, the door opened.
There was Becky. Her eyes were bloodshot and filled with tears, her entire body was wracked with powerful sobs, and she fell into my arms.
“Josh left me. What will I do?”
I didn’t have an answer for her. I held her and let her cry in my arms for a few minutes before leading her inside the house and closing the door. I brought her to her couch, got her a cup of iced water and sat down with her.
We talked all night, I let her tell me everything she wanted to about Josh, and at the end of the night she thanked me, told me she felt better, and she said she was tired and wanted to sleep. I reminded her that she can call me anytime, and that I would check on her the next day.
That night I was unable to sleep. I had a pit of worry in my stomach that wouldn’t go away. I honestly think I only got 30 minutes of sleep that night… if that.
The very first thing next morning, I called her. After several rings, I got her voice mail so I tried again… and again… and again. I left a voice mail asking how she was holding up and if she needed anything, in hopes that she would reach out if she needed me.
After a few days passed with no call back, the knot of worry in my stomach grew tighter and tighter. Until finally I got a knock on my door. There was Becky with a wide grin on her face.
“Becky, what happened? Are you alright?”
She smiled and danced in place, “You won’t believe this but… Josh leaving me was the best thing to ever happen to me.”
Getting dumped is one of the most painful experiences you can have. You invest months and years into a relationship with someone and suddenly that relationship is gone; replaced by a hole where your significant other used to be.
It feels like your life couldn’t get any worse, and you just want to feel sorry for yourself forever. But it doesn’t have to be that way…
5 Reasons Getting Dumped Can Be The Best Thing To Happen To You
1. You Can Focus On Yourself
Being single is the best time to invest in yourself. You may have learned how to make your partner happy – but it’s time to make yourself happy. Being alone gives you time to do some soul-searching and figure out what you really want in life.
2. You Can Reinvest In Your Hobbies
Jogging, shopping, binging on TV Marathons, reading, whatever makes you happy. You suddenly have a lot more time to decide what you want to do. Have you ever wanted to travel across the world? Take a trip to Paris maybe? You can do that.
3. Reconnecting With Friends
One of the best feelings in the world is to spend time with a person you love – but think of all the things you used to do with your friends. Now is a great chance to reconnect with the people in your life and really get reacquainted with them.
4. You Can Find Your Happy Place
Personally, my happy place is curled up on my couch with a good book and the rest of the world shut up. Becky’s happy place was walking around the lake in our town. When you have the time to invest in your “happy place” it can really change your vibe (for the better).
5. You Get To Fall Back In Love
Becky told me the best part about her break up was being allowed to experience falling in love again. Remember that feeling of happiness and pure bliss you got when you first met your ex? You get to experience that falling head over heels all over again. The possibilities are endless.
Have you gone through a rough breakup recently? What do you plan to do now that you’re single? Let me know in the comments below!
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5 Reasons To Celebrate Getting Dumped
- You Can Focus On Yourself
- You Can Reinvest In Your Hobbies
- Reconnecting With Friends
- You Can Find Your Happy Place
- You Get To Fall Back In Love