You have this vibe that something is just off. You don’t know what it is, but something tells you that your man is secretly with another woman.
Maybe there are clues or maybe it’s just a nagging, gut instinct. You might try not to think about it because every time it crosses your mind, it makes you feel sick.
Let’s take the following scenario just to give an example of the kind of thing women go through when it comes to cheating.
You’re out with your guy and he keeps anxiously looking at his cellphone. Odd, he never texts you as much as he’s currently texting the person he is right now. He excuses himself… and takes his phone with him.
Take The Quiz: Is He Cheating On You?
Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Is He Cheating On You” Quiz right now and find out if he’s cheating on you…
Usually he’s really quick at using the bathroom, but right now it feels like you are living each second as a year while you wait for him to get back. You look at your phone, and it’s been ten minutes before he finally gets back to the table and sits down.
What Are Signs He’s Cheating On Me?
|Should You Be Worried?||What Is He Doing?||What Should You Do?|
|Yes||Staying out late, changing his hygeiene drastically, avoiding you, lashing out||Have an open honest conversation about trust with him|
|No||Not returning texts for an hour or two, staying out with his friends||Get to the root of why you don’t trust him (and solve it)|
The rest of the night seems to go well, so you try and let it go. You ask if he can show you a picture he took of the two of you together as an excuse to look at his phone to figure out if he’s secretly texting some girl behind your back. Then he starts acting shady again the minute you ask the question.
“Yeah, I can, hold on a moment”, he rushes to do something on his phone and doesn’t let you look at it. What is he doing?
Again, you let it slip to the back of your mind… until you start to notice other strange things he says and does. He suddenly stops wanting sex so much. He is spending more and more time at work. He starts taking phone calls in other rooms… and then the suspicion smacks you in the face:
“Is he cheating on me?”
The question hits your chest like a lead weight. You love him and you really thought he loved you! Why would he suddenly start cheating on you? Is he really seeing someone else? Does he even like you anymore? You feel like you have to know or your brain will explode.
Related: Top 6 Relationship Red Flags
Unfortunately there is no guideline that tells you exactly how to tell if a guy is cheating on you. Unless you either catch him in the act or he confesses, you can’t know for sure.
Or can you?
Here Are 10 Signs Your Man Might Be Cheating On You:
1. He Is Using His Phone A Lot More (And Not For You)
If he suddenly starts texting more often, but he still takes forever to reply to you… that may be a sign that he’s cheating. It doesn’t mean he is definitely cheating on you. He could just be having an important conversation…
Related: The Real Reason Men Cheat
2. He Suddenly Cares About His Hygiene
You’ve known him long enough to know how he typically cares for himself. If he takes a sudden interest in how he looks, his physical health, and even starts showering more, who is he trying to impress? (Was he trying to impress you or someone else?)
3. He Goes Out More
Whether he’s going out “with friends” or has something come up with family, this could be a red flag that he’s really seeing someone else.
4. He Keeps Working Late
Sudden work emergency? Big project that he didn’t tell you about in advance? If he starts working overtime and is hours on sporadic days of the week working late, he might not actually be working…
Want to know for sure if your man is cheating on you? Take this quiz and find out now:
Is He Cheating Quiz
5. He Avoids Getting Close To You
If you notice that your guy suddenly avoids intimacy with you (or stops entirely), that’s a huge red flag. Some men who fear intimacy will cheat to feel like they still have power over their sex life, and some men cheat simply because they want someone “young and new”… Which leads to my next sign.
6. He’s Selfish
If your man is self-indulgent and puts himself before everything, never compromising with you, he could be the kind of guy to cheat, as infidelity is a selfish act on it’s own.
7. He Follows A *Lot* Of Sexy Women On Social Media
Have you noticed him “liking” a lot of sexy pictures on his Facebook? What about who he watches on Instagram? If they’re mostly hot young women, you can probably guess what’s on his mind…
More: Guy Confession: Why I Cheated
8. He Didn’t Update His Dating Profile (Even If You Started Dating Him)
Maybe you met on Plenty of Fish, or eHarmony, ChristianMingle, or even Match. You updated your profile to proudly show you met a guy you love… and he didn’t update his profile. That could be a sign he’s still looking for someone else.
9. He Lashes Out At You
If your guy starts arguments with you, especially if it’s over something simple, he could be looking for an excuse to get away from you and towards someone else…
10. He Needs “His Privacy”
You thought he was comfortable with you knowing more about him and being close to him, and suddenly he starts needing more and more time by himself. What could he even be doing with all of that time alone? That might be a sign he’s cheating on you.
So What Happens Next?
If you have a gut instinct your guy is cheating on you, then that signals to me that you’re missing one crucial ingredient to a healthy, loving relationship: trust.
Related: Man Decoder: Why Do Men Lie?
If you’ve noticed your guy is doing 1-3 of these things, I would chalk it up to coincidence. Now, if you noticed he was doing 7 or more… then you might be more worried.
If you can’t trust your guy to be faithful to you and you look for signs he’s cheating on you, it’s only going to sow seeds of more suspicion and mistrust in the relationship.
A healthy, fulfilling relationship cannot be built on a basis of suspicion and mistrust. It’s setting yourself up to fail.
Instead, bring a vibe of trust and acceptance into your relationship. Your man will subconsciously notice the change in your vibe and react to it positively.
If he feels safe, happy, and fulfilled, he won’t look to another woman for those same emotional needs to be filled.
If you’ve caught him in the act of cheating, I only have one question for you… Is that a relationship you want to be in?
I hope this helped you figure out whether your man is cheating on you or not, that’s a question I get asked a lot. One thing to keep in mind is that if he’s cheating or you suspect he might cheat in the future he could be losing interest in you and is pulling away from you so you definitely need to read this: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…
Want To Find Out For Sure If He’s Really Cheating On You?
Take this quick (and shockingly accurate quiz and find out for sure if he’s cheating on you…
My boyfriend was all lovey and trustworthy but now I don’t know what to believe. Because he has changed so much and I just keep crying whenever. I see him or even get a reminder of him I don’t know what to do
My boyfriend told me he has started a relationship with another woman ….
He told me he doesn’t love her it’s me he love loves but I this he’s not telling me all about it
We are still in a relationship
I’m currently at his place but he always off he phone he gets back home from work …..
I want you help of what to do
For real… Idk what to do anymore
My bf cheated on me with a hot woman but I don’t want to accept it. A lot of people knows the truth of what happened and is laughing behind my back. They are making fun of me for believing that his lies but my self esteem is too low. He told people that I’m not very good looking and my personality sucks but how can I find someone else if this is true?
How do I know he’s cheating
If he’s distant and if he seems to be changing his personality
My boyfriend does all of these.
Am I overreacting , or is he actually cheating on me .?
My boyfriend carried 2 packs of mint with him he said that everyone sand that his breath stinks … Idk
Second my boyfriend tried to get his teeth white .. He has not even done this while I been with him
And now third he is at work and I called him and usually he gets off the phone at 3:25. But he tried to get off the phone sooner at 3:10 then at 3:20
Pleasecan anyone tell me if he is cheating
I would greatly appreciate it
Can a guy not have any female friends once he is married? I have been married for 18 years happily. I have a couple female friends where I can just go and hang out with by ourselves like any other guy friend. Just because she is of the opposite gender doesn’t always mean something is going on.
Does anyone know the best way to catch a cheater?
This is exactly what happened to me before. Just try to focus the new life. And do not,forget.! Once he or she will cheat you; they have an ability to,do always.! Just take a deep breath and let them go.! I just don’t understand how they can be happy.? If she or he knows that that person cheated someone; how the hell they can create a faking smiles on their face.? Should I scream or should I say bad things about that.? I am just tired to feel like that.! Actually I am happy that he is happy. Anyway if the person cheated before he will going to cheated again.! It is the characteristics of the cheaters.!
I just need someone to answer my question as it got me going crazy, could you tell me why is a female asking my baby father for money ? I have gone through his phone and saw messages from him and her are they involved in something? is he cheating beacause I just don’t understand why
I love my daugthers father, but he has lied to me so many times l just can’t bring myself to trust him anymore. When we met he told me he was single but 3 months later l found out he was still seeing his ex girlfriend of 2 years who he had broken up with a few days before we met. I then told him he has to chose whether he wants to be with her or me. I told him that as much as it hurts l will let him go if he still wanted to be with her. He assured me was done with her but everytime we argued he made an attempt to contact her or another women.
Throughout our relationship I’ve fought over other women that he entertained in secret, l got so paranoid to the point that l couldn’t sleep until l went through his phone. I was convinced he always had something to hide and in some cases he did.
I am not an insecure person but when l found condoms in his wallet in 2 occasions when he hadnt slept at house l was concerned. He denied being with anyone else, in the first incident he said he always had the condoms in his wallet which was a lie. In the second incident he said he found the condoms on the bathroom floor in a club and he was drunk and just put them in his wallet but never used them. I never believed a word he of this til this day but l had no solid proof so l let it go.
At the time l was 8 months pregnant and l so vulnerable, we were sexually active throught out my pregnancy so l didnt understand why he would step out. l just didn’t trust him with my heart again but was willing to try and make it work. I made it clear that l NEVER EVER wanted to find him with condoms in his possession because we never use them. He promised me a SECOND TIME that it would never happen Little did l know.
In February this year we broke up after a huge fight that ended up involving the police. He would come and see his daughter now and again and 2 months later (a week ago) he assured me he had changed and he wanted us to be a family. He started being financially supportive and transparent with his activities and his where abouts (something he wasn’t in he past) l was convinced he was really making an effort. l told myself that his not perfect, no one is and l still love this man and above all we have a beautiful daugther together.
I said l was willing to give it a go with the help of a councellor. I told him l was afraid of getting my heart broken of trusting him again. But he assured me that he loved me and would never hurt me again. I asked him to be honest with me before we start going for councelling. I asked him if he had been with any other woman intimately while we were apart l also mentioned its ok if he had because we were not together l just didnt want to hear it from someone else. He looked me in the eye and told me he hadn’t and l honestly believed him.
He then came over to spend a few days with us, l was doing laundry and remembered him saying he had no clean clothes and his washing machine was acting up. I had some laundry to do so l decided to do his laundry together with mine which is something l always did in the past. While l was getting all the dirty clothes out l found a box of open condoms with one condom missing. I was so upset l was shaking but l kept my cool. I then comfronted him and asked him what he was doing with these condoms if he wasnt seeing anyone. He said his friend had used the one condom and he hadn’t slept with anyone.
This just brought back a flood of lies that he had told me in the past and it just made me so angry. He started shouting and kept saying he never used it and l just refused to believe it. He started defending himself by saying that l had hurt him too in the past but he never held a grudge. I asked him if l had cheated on him or if he had found condoms in house my of which his answer was no. I then asked him why l should tolerate this behaviour from him.
He then said “You’re overreacting! I’ve tried to make this work, I’ve worked my ass off for you and my daughter and this is what l get in return”. He went on to say he can’t keep doing this to himself and that his walking away fully knowing that his innocent. l love this man so much, he is my soul mate but l know sometimes we just have to let go of the people we love if they are toxic. My whole family thinks he is back news but l still went with my heart although my gut feeling told me otherwise. Im so confused l dont know what to do. Would you believe his story if you were me?
Troubled, hurt and confused.
its been 3 and half year i am in realtion. we were always close and never hides anything. he has many family problems but he never hid it. but now he doesn’t share a anything an hides the fact that he is using WhatsApp from another sim. he is always busy. but then if i start ignoring him, he will come to me. i don’t know what’s happening and it’s killing me everyday. please help me out..
So i have had my doubts he’s cheating considering he cheated on his ex with me. But was lying to both of us and seeing us both till i found out he was lying. I gave him an ultimatum he tells her or i tell her he didn’t so i told his ex everything. Than they broke up later on he Asks me out i said yes. The first year we couldn’t keep our hands off each other And we hated to be apart. Till he started going behind my back and calling his ex when id fall asleep or go see her after work. It’s been 2 years since then and now he’s not intimate with me at all. I have to fight for his attention. He’s alway lashing out at me. He’s gotten very verbally abusive and mean to me lately. He used to have me as his phone wallpaper now he changed it. He used to let me look at his phone, now anything i ask its not my business. He blocked me on all social media. He doesn’t even have me in his phone it’s just saved under my initials. No contact photo anymore either. He’s definitely distanced him self tremendously. He doesn’t even hold me or kiss me make out nothing. Even when we do have sex every couple weeks he doesn’t even look at me anymore. And we used to have the best sex ever, alllllllllll the time. Now I’m lucky if we have intimacy once every other week. We got into a fight and i mentioned i thought he cheated on me he even said yes. I don’t know if out of anger but everyone thinks he is. But my kids and his son are so Attached. I don’t know what to do.
He is most definitely cheating, and maybe trying to start a new relationship with someone else or getting back with his ex. I will say this, “the same way you got him is the same way you will Lose him”. I am sure that when him and his ex that he cheated on with for you l, first got together everything was wonderful and she thought it would last for real until he start doing the same things you have described above to her. Then you came along. When a men says he cheated please don’t take it as an angry outburst. He is telling you at this point he doesn’t care how you feel about and when you do gather the facts and/or prove that he’s cheating he will only use it against you claiming that he told you but you didn’t believe him. So please do yourself a huge favor and leave that relationship right where it stand. I guarantee you will see the real him. Sorry if this was a little harsh but I don’t like sugar coating anything because that how you end up in a long term abuse relationship. Meaning if you keep making excuses for him he will began to notice and feel like ” hey I can do what I want with her and she’ll still stay”. But that’s another reply for another day.
How do I research if my husband is cheating
My opinion’s once cheater = always cheater …
If not this girl where’re another girls …
I know it Just it dont like it and i dont want to believe it !!! change??? … Maybe for a year again they’ll repeat it ! also if you forgive him once always you will and he knows it !
Mine have all the signs but I don’t care anymore. He must do what ever he want at anytime that’s suit him. Not because I don’t love him but it doesn’t help me.
I know he is cheating but how can I catch him?
Hi my name is Livia and I was wonder my man showed me a while back him trying to cheat and apologies for it and said he will either delete his account on fb and make a new one or delete hot porn fb crap and I was wondering is he cheating on me he has all the signs just no physical time and if my mad did I do know he stopped but I want know from all you women is it true? And I am to scared I believe with all my heart he is a good man very global and oblivious but yet smart he can come off as cheating but he doesn’t. I mean he showed me without asking I had to go on his fb which he gave me his info and delete them now he has a new fb and forgot to well friend request me and IDK what goes on he doesn’t let me see everything unless I’m logged on into but if I get mad and delete people int the past he would refriend them and wait til I ketch them and delete a lot of his words ad u can’t undrstand the covo and talking to his ex give them his number saying we went dating in January well we talked about that one. But yall understand where I’m coming from right
ive been with the same guy forever and i just found where he has been cheating on me STILL
he begs me for faithfulness and loyalty yet refuses to give such
My boyfriend stephen is an auto body technician weve been together for a year now ive met his kids ive met his ex ive met all his family and i basically lived at his place all year. Hes very selfish and never compromises with me when i want something and lately hes been wanting time to himself. He lives with a female roomate that ive been around almost everyday. I went to her baby shower. He comes over to my house every other day and stays the night on my twin bed but im thinking what hes doing those days hes not here. Am i crazy and sabotaging my relationship.
Omg that’s incredibal Id be so concerned aswell
Well I bin with my man for a year in a half and at first we will spend time with each other with no problem now he argues with me he blames me for his situation I even came out pregnet by him and I took it out because he said he didn’t want it because his sons mother won’t let him see his son if she finds out but they haven’t bin together for three years he bracks up with me because he says I’m a burden to him that I’m crazy that I over exaggerated and that I’m jelouse of him and all I do is help him out everything he ask me I do for him he took me on a cruise for 8 days and treated me horrible he even throw me out the room and told me to sleep on the deck of the boat
One can cheat but shows none of the above mentioned signs
my has just got a job ,he finishes at weird hours he tries to look good just for work hes on my phone 24/7 even takes it to work.. (he doesnt have a phone) hes lashy doesnt really feel intimate with me ignores me when im talking to him ,hes also being very clingy lately,just makes me wander..? my gut tells me hes not telling me something but i would like to believe hes not cheating
What if he is showing about 5 of these signs and you have asked him many times and he says no? I know for a fact he is a really good liar and when i ask he goes into a speal about id never do that to you, why would i cheat?
And then he leaves his phone around me which makes me think, he wouldnt do that if he were! But I cant help thinking if i go through his phone, and cant find anything he could’ve easily deleted things.. expesh if he knows im suspicious about it.. I just cant shake feeling that he is and the signs point to both ways.. I’m so confused. Im not sure if im just going crazy or to listen to my gut? HELP!!
He’s not cheating on you. Stop treating him like a cheater or he WILL become one. If she’s always accusing me I should just do it!!! J/s
Same with me…he is a good liar …has alot of female friends n is always on phone calls…i notice he text alot lately bt never text me…n the last time i happened to go tru his phone they were all deleted…i talked to him about it n he said he’d never cheat on me…. my guts keep telling me he’s cheating. And i don’t have the time to go through the stress of investigating him.
Wat if u see all this signs, you ask him and he said “have I ever cheated on you before” wat do I do?
Break up duh iv been reading these and wow I don’t do any of this stuff to my gf Id been with now for like 7 years and Ya I can’t believe the way some men treat women
And they put up with it!! That’s what gets me! I guess love it blind
Whenever I tell my dude he’s been gone for longer than he should have for the task he claims to be doing he starts giving me a time line and I stop listening, which I’m sure he picks up on. The other day he went to hang out with his friend dave and was supposed to pick me up after but he took longer than he said and he said he was in a different part of town than daves house, when I asked him why he was over there he got mad and said I should know because he said he’s getting weed….which he ended up not getting….his phone constantly goes off now and it used to rarely. My gut says he’s a cheater but I kinda don’t want to know
that was helpful… but Um still a lil confused
There are many ways to find out if he has cheated on you, but the easiest that I could find was by asking his friends :)
Yeah but as a man I know men will lie to you say yeah he’s cheating to try get im your pants so I wouldn’t believe anything
Just listin to it
So easy to tell. Most men cannot even look you in the face after they have cheated. If they can, those are the ones that you need to run from, fast!
I have noticed things like this in the past with others, but never saw any OTHER evidence of cheating. Sort of weird.
I was afraid I would find some of the signs that I recognized recently, on this post. Time to have a talk with my husband!
I pray for those that are cheated on because it is not something that is easy to handle.
In many cases in can ruin the trust they might have had in the opposite sex, for good.
It might sound weird, but I can usually tell the minute that I lay eyes on the guy. There is just something about his attitude that changes when he cheats.
Oh man, I was hoping that this was not the case. My boyfriend has been so distant lately and I have been wondering about him cheating. I hope it is not true, but I am going to ask.
There is very little that you can do when a guy is cheating. However, if you decide to keep him around, there is little that I could do for you.
Yes, I would say these signs are quite easy to see.
I would question what the reason for following sexy woman on social media would be all about. Why wouldn’t I be the only one he needs to follow?
If you have a man that you have to watch this closely, you might be in trouble. It does not pay to try and “fix” him.
What if he starts to care about his hygiene because he is with me?
Does anyone here really think it is a big deal if the guy doesn’t remove “single” from his dating profile right when you meet? I wouldn’t care.
You know, I searched the internet for signs that he might be cheating on me and this is where I ended up. After reading through this I am afraid that he really is cheating on me :/
I guess if there are some changes in his attitude that might mean something. I would just ask him about it before jumping to whether he is cheating on me or not.
It might at least be a sign that you should ask him about things.
I wonder what a man would think if he read these. Would he take notes and realize what to avoid for being caught?
LOL, probably. Men are so sneaky and jerky about stuff like cheating and things like that.
I hate being cheated on. It has happened so many times that I have sworn off relationships for 1 year.
Everyone does. I think we these signs that point to cheating, you should be quite prepared.
All of these signs are well worth looking out for, however, they might not ALL lead to the conclusion that you are being cheated on.
A lot of these are valid reasons to suspect cheating. In fact, I think they are all quite obvious.
So true Sooooo true
If I noticed ANY of these in a guy that I knew, I would be all over accusing him of cheating and tell his spouse how I felt so she could do the investigation she needs to do.
Oh yeah! There is no doubt in my mind that I would accuse him of cheating!
I avoid all of these things as a man by making sure that my girl knows that she is only thing on my mind, regardless of the situation we are in. Cheating is not cool and I would hate if it happened to me, so I do not do it to others.
If you are going to be one of those people that worry about why your b/f is cheating, then more power to you. If a person is cheating, they do not deserve anything more.
There are many ways to find out if your gut is a cheater. The best is to just ask him, don’t you think? Most of the time you can tell right away from his answer.
I would ask him right away. the look on his face can tell a lot!
I have never cheated on a single girlfriend that I have had. However, if I displayed these signs that I was cheating, I would expect that a person is smart enough to catch onto it!
Getting around the fact that your man might be cheating on you is not easy, however, there is one easy way to find out. Just ask him :) Some times the surprise of the question can garner an honest response. Jut remember, it might be one that you are not going to be happy with.
I always thought that I would be able to tell if my boyfriend/husband was cheating on me. I was wrong and it took a real mistake on his part for me to even notice. I feel like an idiot, especially after reading through these signs.
My husband got a new computer last week and now has it password protected. He claims that the operating system requires that. Is that true or is he hiding something from me?
You never know. Regardless of the operating system requirements, he should give you the password to show that he is not hiding anything.
Very good signs to watch out for. You should also remember to not go overboard and just flat accuse him of cheating. An investigation is most likely needed to be sure you are right before you jump into catch him in the act.
Needs his privacy? LOL, for what? If he cannot share it with me, than I feel that he might be keeping something from me, which usually ends with him being a cheater!
If a guy is asking for privacy, you are either not that serious, or there is something else going on, right?
I tend to think that I might not have updated my online profile because I was spending more time with my new honey :) I will get to it when I am ready.
My husband has been using his phone more, but I just thought it was because it was a new phone and fun to mess with. When I asked him if he is talking to other woman, he said no, do I believe him?
I am not sure that just because he is following “SEXY” woman on Facebook that he IS cheating. However, I would say that if you are uncomfortable with it, something should be said and then you can go from there.
I agree. Very beautiful people have beautiful friends, typically. That does not mean that he is dating all of these woman, right?
As a good girl I don’t look at other men so hurts bad when he needs other girls body’s on his Facebook n random girls makes me feel less attractive
It would be bad for me to catch my husband cheating, so are these all of the signs that I should look for? I am curious if there is anything else.
Its too bad that sometimes the signs that he is cheating are NOT that easy to notice. Even though some on this list are quite obvious, you just never know for a fact.
LOL, I would say these signs are quite obvious! IF I saw any of these, I would be asking questions right away!
Especially if all of a sudden he does not want to be anywhere close to you. Even though it does not always mean that he is cheating, it is a sign that something is not right.
He cares about his hygiene? No, maybe that is because I have been getting on his case for the last two months about it and he is finally listening :)
Very good tips and I must say that most of them would point you in the same direction, he is cheating. I would say that if you see the signs, it is time to watch what is going on, or just come right out and ask out of the blue. Sometimes you can catch them off guard and they will answer you normally.
These are all very good signs that he might be cheating. I would think that as soon as you see any of these happening for a long term, you would start to ask questions.