What makes a man miss a woman? And can you make him miss you on demand? Here’s how to do it!
Whether you’ve just broken up with your boyfriend or you’re flirting with a new guy, if you want to push him to discover his real feelings for you, he needs to have an opportunity to miss you.
We all want to be missed, because it’s a clear sign that we’re important enough in someone’s life and we occupy enough space in their mind for them to miss us when we’re gone.
If you want to wake up to find that wonderful “I miss you” text from him, keep reading to find out what the 3 steps are to get him to miss you.
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Step 1: Don’t Try Too Hard
When you’re getting desperate and trying too hard, you can feel it. You can recognize it by the embarrassment and regret that instantly wash over you when you know you’ve crossed the line – sent too many messages, called him when you didn’t need to, fished for compliments…
You fish for contact, and then when he doesn’t respond, or doesn’t do so enthusiastically or fast enough, you feel even worse, because you know you shouldn’t have texted him, you know it, damn it!
Insecurity pushes him further away
But why do you do it? Why do you keep clinging to him when you know you better?
Because your needs aren’t being met. And instead of waiting for him to miss you, you’re trying to MAKE him miss you. And you know forcing something doesn’t work.
Why? Because he can smell your insecurity from miles away.
With that in mind, here are some don’ts:
- Don’t…be intentional in your behavior, but pretend to be casual – like texting him every day, “just” to say hi. That’s not casual.
- Don’t…make attention-seeking posts on Facebook.
- Don’t…try to make him jealous by posting pictures with other men or stuff like that, it’s just cheap and obvious.
- Don’t…text his friends for attention.
If you’re resorting to these behaviors, there’s a good chance he’s feeling smothered, which is entirely counterproductive. If this behavior was triggered by him pulling away, then perhaps take cues from him and instead of pushing harder, give him space.
You’ll be surprised how well things can work in your favor when you just give him the chance to miss you. Which takes me to the next step.
Step 2: Give Him Space
The best thing you can give a man when he is pulling away is space. After all, he’s taking some time for a reason, right? By not pestering him, you are showing respect for his feelings and his desires, and demonstrating maturity. You can understand that sometimes people require some time, and you’re not needy and clingy. Score!
You know what will make him miss you? Absence.
Just think of all the things you miss:
- That friend you never get to see.
- Christmas! It’s only once a year!
- Watermelon, because you can only get it in the summer.
- Your man, when you haven’t seen him in forever.
ding ding ding!
Absence makes the heart grow fonder
Okay, maybe not for everyone. But it’s true for some men and women! It’s very easy for some guys to feel smothered, and for some women to feel abandoned, so you can see where all of our problems come from.
Can we solve these ongoing issues? Yes, we can!
Here are the Dos:
- He needs to communicate when he needs space, but you also need to learn how to read his signals.
- Pull away a bit and leave him be when you sense him reaching that point, thus giving him a chance to miss you.
- You, on your part, need to be able to communicate to him that you need some attention.
- Also, learn to find attention in other places when he is not entirely available, emotionally.
Step 3: Go Slow And Know Your Value
Ultimately, there is no magic recipe for making a man do anything. Therein lies the challenge. You can’t make someone love you, you can’t make them appreciate you, and you can’t make them miss you.
You know what you can do? Be fully aware of your value and what you bring to the table in a relationship and choose your partner based on that. What I’m trying to say is: Raise your standards, girl.
Yeah, it’s true that everyone needs a bit of space and it’s necessary in order for you and your partner to not start resenting each other because you spend too much time together and you start getting on each other’s nerves.
But if your man isn’t treating you right or he’s ignoring you, there is no amount of effort or mind games on your part that will make HIM worth it.
It’s not just about respectfully allowing him his space, but putting the attention back on yourself. The world does not revolve around his needs, and yours need to be met as well. You can’t be ignored, just because he can’t communicate his feelings. Because if he does, you won’t be there anymore.
Debunking the myth of The Chase
Conventional wisdom indicates that you need to make him chase you in order to want you. Play a game of push-and-pull and ignore him at times to drive him crazy. Like you’re some sort of prize to catch.
But that’s a little dehumanizing. And it sets you up as an object, and not a person.
Here’s why it doesn’t work:
- You don’t want a man who sees you as a possession to be won, or who is ONLY interested when you aren’t. That’s not a healthy relationship.
- He needs to be aware of how much you mean to him and appreciate you all the time, not just when he wakes up without you there.
- You can’t reward bad behavior in a partner who doesn’t consider your needs, because then he learns that no matter how little effort he puts in, you will still take him back.
Here’s what to do, instead:
- Don’t play games; live your life as normal. That means going to work, going out, meeting friends, and focusing on yourself and what makes you happy. Don’t dote on a man who doesn’t dote on you.
- Do not accept bad behavior and a man who ignores your needs. If he doesn’t know how to appreciate what he has, or he is incapable of being a good partner, maybe he is not the right man for you. Find someone who is.
- If your man is otherwise good, but you feel like you’ve been stepping on each other’s toes lately, or he’s been taking you for granted, then a break always does a couple good. Go visit your parents for a weekend, or go on vacation with your girlfriends. By the time you come back, you will both be happy to see each other because you had some time to breathe.
As you can see, it’s all about taking some space, but also about picking the right person – the man you deserve – to begin with. Know your value and make sure the man you’re with knows it as well, and appreciates you accordingly. He’ll treat you well always, not just when you’re gone.
Now in any relationship I’ve found there are 2 pivotal moments that determine if your relationship ends in heartbreak or you get to live happily ever after so it’s vitally important that you take the next step and read this right now, because at some point the man you want is going to ask himself: Is this the woman I should commit to for the long term? That answer determines everything… Do you know how men determine if a woman is girlfriend material (the type of woman he commits himself to) or if he sees you as just a fling? If not you need to read this next: The #1 Thing Men Desire In A Woman…
The second problem almost all women experience: At some point he starts to lose interest. He doesn’t call you back or he becomes emotionally closed off. He seems like he’s losing interest or pulling away – do you know what to do? If not you’re putting your relationship and the future of your love life in great danger, read this now or risk losing him forever: If He’s Pulling Away, Do This…
Want to find out if you can get your ex back? Click here to take our quick (and shockingly accurate) “Can You Get Your Ex Back” Quiz right now and find out if you can ever get him back or if he’s gone for good…